Now do you know why I am not a feminist? This writer spoke my mind

The best piece I read on Egyptian Women ... and for 100 time I am telling you I am not a feminist ... in fact I am allergic to weak submissive women

http://wanderingscarab.blogspot.com/2009/10/damsel-in-distress-syndrome.html

"How many of them believe that it's a man's responsibility to solely provide before and after marriage, whereas it's optional for women? How many of the...m believe that it's okay to work within the confines of the prison that they have created for themselves? How many of them believe that they have the right to manipulate men? How many of them believe that women should be able to choose their line of work freely, but at the same time believe that there should be special conditions for women who need to go home early so they don't walk home late at night? How many of them believe that a women is entitled to a good home and money that is to be supplied by the husband? How many of them demand that women be free to travel without a man, yet shun other women who actually do it?"

http://wanderingscarab.blogspot.com/2009/10/damsel-in-distress-syndrome.html

Relationship Warning: Do not get involved with Egyptian Men!

Because of the nature of my work in the tourism sector, I am used to hearing that this or that country has issued a travel warning to its citizens who plan on traveling to Egypt, especially in the aftermath of an attack. Naturally, most warnings address safety and security issues, and some warnings dedicate a section or two to hygiene and harassment. Lately, and because of the increasing number of divorces, custody issues, and domestic violence cases, some countries warn their women from Egyptian men. Yes, they tell them clearly not to get emotionally involved or legally committed to an Egyptian man!

I did not just make that up. I got it first hand from a European woman who is living in Egypt, was married to an Egyptian man, has a son, and is currently divorced. “He swept me off my feet with his sweet words, compliments, attentive gestures, romance, and warmth; he was a god compared to European men, who are often distant, reserved, and not very emotional. I fell in love with him like never before. Bit by bit, I began opening up too and, against my better judgment, I gave up all my defenses. In three months, he asked me to marry him, and in my culture this is a very serious step. I translated his proposal as the epitome of love and I gladly accepted.”

I listened to Sandy and I knew exactly how she felt when she first met “her hero”. I know how it feels to jump in a jar of honey thinking of how sweet it would taste and how rich and overwhelming it would feel, only to get your hair tangled in its stickiness and eventually you drown in its suffocating viscosity. I asked Sandy to continue narrating her experience and she told me that his family was against the marriage; “they told him that I was loose and that he should get married to a virgin. They warned him that I would corrupt his children and reminded him that I was from a different religion. His mother hated how I dressed no matter how modest. All my attempts at communication failed but I was heads over heels in love with him to read the warning signs. He assured me that he loved me and that he was not willing to give up his soul mate.”

Her eyes welled as she told me her story. I tried to be as empathetic as possible but I was growing angrier by the minute. I naturally assumed that her guy was a lowlife Egyptian male parasite who wanted a way out of the country or easy sex. Because un-Egyptian women are not as class conscious, they miss out on all the “low-class” signals that his body language, address, grooming, verbiage, phonetics, and interests give away. I was wrong! “He is an AUC graduate and the descendant of one of the biggest families in Egypt. He had the looks, the manners, the class, the charm, and the money. He was so open-minded and understanding – I have never met anyone who was as perfect.” Sandy corrected me.

I was more than curious to know what could go wrong with such a compatible intercultural union. “We got married amongst his friends. His family did not attend but this was natural in my country; we were two responsible adults and we were in charge of our life-altering decisions. After marriage, he began changing; suddenly he had hurtful comments about my wardrobe, more hurtful comments about my public demeanor, and … he hit me! He told me that he loved me but suddenly his love began suffocating me. I realized that I got married to a very jealous possessive insecure spoilt violent person!”
Again I identified with every word she said. I KNOW our men! I asked Sandy about the frequency and the intensity of the jealousy fits and the violence attacks and she told me that it became on daily basis; “the tender loving caring man that I fell in love with disappeared. I was stuck with a person who mastered ignoring me, and when he looked at me, he told me that I was ugly and needed plastic surgery.” With her long golden locks tied back in a ponytail, Sandy was looking at me with deep blue eyes that rested on pink cheeks. She was flawless pretty! But I am fully aware of the self-esteem blows that our men know how to perfectly aim.

After a year of suffering and utter misery, Sandy got a divorce … and a son! A single foreign mother in Egypt could be quiet traumatizing. I asked her why she did not go back to her country; she told me that her Egyptian god threatened to take away her son. To add a more dramatic denouement to this repetitive farce, Sandy told me that after their divorce, he got married to a veiled Egyptian girl and that he stopped sending her alimony. This was when she went to the embassy and that was when they told her “we told you so!”

Just writing about this topic clogs my arteries; seriously, I cannot breathe! Sandy and her story is the trigger behind this article but I have witnessed many other stories that started with “he was so sweet” and ended in “he hit me” or “he walked out on me” or “I hate Egyptian men”. Even the girls who were spared the marriage disaster still enjoyed a rough ride on the dating arena. Sandy told me that her countrymen could still bully their women and that they were far from perfect, but at least they were honest, straightforward, and took marriage seriously. Like many Egyptian girls, she felt that he cheated his way into her heart and that he tricked her into loving him. It was ironic though, how Sandy thought that Egyptian women were best equipped to deal with their men.

The Beauty & The Geek

If the producers of The Beauty and The Geek wanted to torture someone who thinks of herself as a beauty by having her date any of those plain geeks on the show, then I would have made an excellent candidate. I am quite certain that those girls do not care about the geeks; they are in it for the money or the fame. I am also positive that they do not continue to date them once the cameras are off. With a pat on the head and a kiss on the cheek they send them off with their goddess-like smiles. Bottom line, the geeks are nice but they are not dating material! I cannot date Winnie the Pooh!

On her show, Ricki Lake invited some girls who were “single by choice” and asked them about their physical requirements in a man. They all seemed to judge a book by its cover and have lost plenty of good guys to a fixation on physical attractiveness. Ricki told them that she had what they were looking for but the name of the game is a blindfolded date dare; the girls will go on a literally blind date! I admit that my eyes have always deceived me into choosing the jerk over the geek but what am I supposed to do? Keep the blindfold on to maintain the chemistry?

So what is it that attracts me to, or repels me from, a man? I tossed away the character nonsense, the vision and mission clichés, and, by digging deeper into the layers of my Freudian heaven of a psyche, I narrowed it down to attractiveness! Yes! The attractiveness of a man is directly proportionate to my being attracted to him. Through extensive research Dallas Barabasz-Lynn has been able to discern the inner structure of attraction. The Ladder Theory claimed that 50% of a woman’s attraction to a man depends on physical attraction, 20% on competition, 20% on novelty, and 10% on other things. Power and money were categorized separately; the amount of money, and the degree of power, required to get a woman’s attention change according to her age. At the age of 16 a gift and a love note would have done the trick. As of the age of 25, a woman’s definition of the richest and the most powerful man changes with her exposure and demands.

In all my happy articles and sweet dreams I envisioned myself with the tall dark and handsome prince; the captivating gaze, the broad shoulders, the flawless smile, the husky voice, and hard in the right places - muscular that is. I have a soft spot for long soft hair, breath-freshener, clean laundry, and perfume. I also spot check nails and hands for cleanliness. Jerks who met these criteria made a doormat out of the little princess’s heart – yours truly!

Good guys who, in my eyes, had a weight or a shape issue were discarded immediately. Those who looked anything less than perfect were tormented to fit a mold that damaged me more than it hurt them. Those who were eager to please, I labeled as geeks, and those who accepted my inner or outer deformities, I crucified on the basis of their own scars and frailties.

The Ladder Theory pointed out how gals like me are attracted to competition; by competition, Lynn meant disinterest. The attractiveness of a man is by far stronger if he has other interests in life than making us happy. We are more tempted to pursue those who run away from us. “Ultimately, almost all guys learn this truth: The best way to never score with a woman is to show too much interest in her.” says Lynn.

What about novelty? Who wants an ordinary guy with a normal life and a normal job? – boring … yuckkkkkk! “Something different is more attractive. Like someone who does not have to work like most people because they have lots of money” says Lynn. I will add to that a few disorders that spice up the appeal of novelty: workaholic, alcoholic, manic depressive, obsessive compulsive, hypochondriac, malingerer, and chronic liar – yes, I have seen it all!

Moral of the story, if you are attractive, rich, powerful, novel, and show no interest in her, she is almost guaranteed to want to get intimate with you. Bonus points for destroying her self esteem, flirting with her friends, cheating on her, and being always late, forgetful, noncommittal, manipulative, and controlling – Isn’t this the definition of the Alfa male? Isn’t that the man who had the lion’s share of my verbal, visual, and written curses?

“So Beauty, why complain now of being painfully single, when you detest the jerks you have created and reject the geeks you have attracted?” – asked the voice of reason that I so often silence!

Egypt: The People vs The Country

Do people make the country? Or, does the country make the people?
I - a very proud Egyptian - have seen a lot of the country and enough of the people and here are my thoughts:

• If the people do not have manners; the country is rude.
• If the people spit in the street; the country is disgusting.
• If the people do not shower; the country stinks.
• If the people touch their privates in the street; the country is perverted.
• If the people throw garbage in the street; the country is dirty.
• If the people do not brush their teeth; the country is full of yellow/brown smiles.
• If the people have a loud pitch; the country sounds like a hen den.
• If the people are frustrated; the country is reputed for harassment.
• If the people do not stop at red lights; the country is always congested.
• If the people do not drive safely; the country has a high accident rate.
• If the people do not fix their cars; the country is hazed out with pollution.
• If the people do not put road-signs; the country is a maze.
• If the people do not know how to drive; the country has the worst roads.
• If the people abhor rules; the country is in chaos.
• If the people do not respect schooling; the country is illiterate.
• If the people do not like to read; the country is ignorant.
• If the people insist on talking bad English; the country stutters.
• If the people do not keep their promise; the country is never taken seriously.
• If the people lie; the country is known for liars.
• If the people cheat; the country is known for fraud.
• If the people are dishonest; the country has no answers.
• If the people are not tolerant; the country is intolerable.
• If the people do not practice what they preach; the country is double-faced.
• If the people envy one another; the country is sick with jaundice.
• If the people step on one another’s toes; the country is full of swollen toes.
• If the people stab each other in the back; the country is sore with deadly wounds.
• If the people are lazy; the country is stagnant.
• If the people are artificial; the country is a disgrace.
• If the people are stoned; the country is numb.
• If the people are confused; the country loses direction.
• If the people do not know the truth; the country is misled.
• If the people are poor; the country is naked.
• If the people have no dreams; the country is dead.
• If the people do not have a present; the country will not have a future.
• If the people do not think of the future; the country will live in the past.
• If the people do not change themselves; the country will not change them.
• If I could get rid of such people; I might save the country.
• I just hate the people; but I am in love with the country.

Hail thee Ostrich Land!

I had a horrible nightmare! No! I live in a horrible nightmare! I want to wake up but it is the reality that I am living.

Today, I am not a writer; I am just a girl who is seeing red with anger and I need to vent - again.

My mom is not talking to me! Why? Because I said in my relationships segment on OTV that I "interviewed some young folks that I met when I was smoking a shisha." - Yes, that's all I said.

You might think that she did not know that I smoked shisha until I shamelessly announced it on air. Wrong! She knows and she sat with me a few times as I hubbled and bubbled.

You might think that no one else knows about my disgraceful pass-temps. No! I smoke with my brother, my male cousins, my female cousins, my colleagues, my friends, and my students - I have a shisha at home that she has seen a million times!

What is her point then? It is the same lame sentence that I have been hearing all my life: "What will people say?"

This is the same logic that is used to build the fake social facades that I abhor so much.

I am quite limited when it comes to understanding such statements. Those "people", along with ghosts, demons, and spirits, are in the same category in my head - they are there but we have our separate lives and our paths don't cross. I don't fetch them and they don't come after me - end of story.

Before my mom hung up, I promised her to announce on the coming episode, that her shame of a girl moved out a few years ago because she dared grow up!

This society is made up of male and female ostriches and I will make a fortune selling their meat - for some reason that sounds familiar in a deja vu sense.

I am not defending shisha smokers ... it is a ridiculous habit; but - excuse my metaphor - I am marking my territory from people who, undeservedly, happen to have a say in my life by peeing all over them every chance I get.

Until Death do us Part

Until Death Do Us Part

(Shuffle)

Another Stupid Adult

“I love you; I know how to make you happy; I am so strong; I will make you faint on our wedding night!” He said with pride to his future bride – yours truly – 12 years ago. I cannot deny that there are times when I wonder how my life would have differed had I not called off my wedding. If I woke up on the right side of the bed, my thoughts took me to a cozy house with a loving husband and lovely kids; but if it was one of my countless bad hair days, I envisioned a miserable wife in a boring marriage with teary-eyed kids, and suffering sleepless nights contemplating a flawless murder. I am certain that had I married the guy who used to exercise his “stick”, or the guy who wanted to deliver his own babies, or the alcoholic, or the neurotic, or the psychotic, or the caveman, or any other guy, I would have been divorced. I do not think I would have made it past the first month, let alone the first year. I was miraculously saved but not everyone was as lucky; some were even as unlucky as ending their marriage months after it started.

What fed their dreams to the shredder? What turned their vows into curses? To love but not to hold? For the better but not for the worst? For the richer because no one wants the poorer? In health but never in sickness? What would make a young bride runaway from the love nest? What would make prince charming flee on his not-so-white horse? Was it a bad choice? Was it that marriage put an end to the dating farce? Is it the lies? Is it the false pretences? Could it be expectations? Could their premature divorce be the only natural outcome of the marriage of a couple who were incubated in a schizophrenic society? Am I being too pessimistic? Am I being too realistic? To get my answers I had to ask the men and women in question. I wanted neither the staged sugar-coated replies nor the decent socially smart conclusions; I wanted the ugly shocking truth – the kind of truth that neither feared exposure nor knew any inhibitions. I created a male account on an adult site to lure the girls and a female account to entrap the guys. I searched for divorced men and women between the age of 21 and 30. I got my answers … and more.

Sara is 25, she got married when she was 21 to the man she loved since she was 16. She is on that site looking for a man who could love her and give her the warmth that her marriage was deprived of. She cannot take off her veil because of her family; she cannot get a divorce because she does not want to move in again with her parents. But deep down, she feels divorced and acts accordingly. Mohamed (28), her husband, is addicted to adult dating sites, and he is on that same site chasing women and doting on them, while she is withering at home alone - or in the arms of someone else. She has been demoted from wife to roommate, and he does not want to have kids. Mohamed’s pictures with his “girlfriends”, his chats, and his mementos are right under her nose – he does not care enough to wipe his traces. “Sara owes me”, he revealed to my male alias; he married her knowing that she was not a virgin. He believes that his actions are righteous and justified, and that she should be grateful that he saved her, and her family, from shame. “I will get a divorce eventually … I am so unhappy” said Sara and Mohamed not knowing that I was talking to both of them.

Mostafa (29) is another story; he fell in love with Menna (24) and after a dating period of one year, they got married with the blessings of both families. The marriage lasted for one problem-filled year, and finally they got a divorce. Mostafa is looking for sex. He wants to prove that the divorce was not his fault; he keeps saying that he is good in bed and is very desirable but his wife was distant and frigid. He wrote countless lines describing how passionate he is and how he knows and understands exactly what women need. Mostafa has watched plenty of xx rated movies and he wanted to re-enact each and every scene with his wife only to be faced with her shocked eyes and expressionless face. When he noticed that I was reserved, he snapped at me saying “I do not need another inexpressive b****.” Zeina (23) enjoyed talking to my female alias; she was the one doing the hunting. Her marriage lasted for three months. One night, she got a call from a hospital telling her that her husband has been in an accident. Being the dutiful wife she was, she hurried to the hospital only to be told that her husband was involved in a homosexual “gathering” that obviously went sour – they beat him up, raped him, and threw him in the street. Zeina does not want to get married again.

Khaled (30) and Mona (25) had an arranged marriage. Khaled had drinking problems and a very unstable career. He had tantrums and Magda’s face and body paid for his insecurity. He used to cry and she used to forgive him. The frequency of the frenzies increased and she could not take it anymore; hence, the divorce. Magda does not want to meet anyone; she is just looking for venting space. Karim (23) is living in a dreamy bubble of his own. He got married right after he graduated to his college sweetheart. He wanted to love her forever. He loved her hair, her sweet voice, her shy gaze, and how she understood him well. After their marriage one shock followed the other; her body hair, her morning breath, her horrible cooking, her hair in the bathtub, her monthly pads in the waste bin, her watching TV all night, and many other little things that he never imagined in his sugar babe. Karim used to believe in love, now he believes in co-habilitation before marriage – even if it was just short trips.

Mira (25) has a two-year old girl from a horrible marriage. He was 20 years older and was extremely jealous; his fits erupted whenever he caught a man looking at her. Mira told me that she had to quit work. She avoided unmarried female friends and all male friends. She was afraid to greet a relative she ran into in the street and, by time, everyone avoided her too. On the other hand, Salem had plenty of affairs and he used to brag about them all the time and Mira had to either pretend that she was deaf or that she knew he was joking. “My daughter is a blessing but Salem threatened to take her if I got married … I need a man and if I cannot get a husband then so be it.” Jina (26) got divorced two years after her marriage because of her mother in law; “the woman had no clue what privacy meant. She had a key to our house and used it at anytime. She asked about what we ate, where we went, and how many times we did it. My ex was not man enough to protect our marriage from such an invasion. I have no regrets other than marrying him in the first place.”

Sally (22) was the victim of a sadist; “he used to whip me when I was late, burn me when I asked questions, sodomize me in return for money, and stick a needle in sensitive parts of my body for every mistake he said I made. He told me that this was because he loved me and he wanted me to be a better person. I used to cry a lot and I was so embarrassed; I could not tell anyone what was happening behind our closed doors.” Sally submitted to his sick needs and desires for six months until, one day she fainted in the street and the passer-bys took her to the hospital. There the doctors were horrified and they called her husband and her family. She got her divorce on that same day. Sally told me that she never knew the man she got married to and that she found herself in a house with a total stranger who used her and abused her in the name of love. Her mother told her on her wedding night that a respectful wife obeyed her husband and kept him satisfied – otherwise he would leave her. Sally blamed her family for her disaster of a marriage; “they over-sheltered me to protect me but it was their ways that made me an appealing prey for such a sick man. I learned the hard way and I am now gaining my own experiences. I am not thinking of marriage; I just want to explore the world.”

The men and women who shared with me their sob stories are victims of our society. The double standards that they are brought up to adopt create what we call in business, an execution gap. There is a big void between where we really are and where we want to be; what we want and what we have; how we feel and how we act. We drown in an abyss of deluding illusions, unrealistic expectations, fake emotions, consuming demands, and the inevitable frustration. We get married for the wrong reasons; we mistake lust for love and confuse stability with stagnation. Mothers are over protective as though they want to suck us back into their wombs. Fathers discriminate between their sons and daughters. Women do not practice what they preach; they sing to the deaf ears of their male counterparts. Men do not meet the promises they make; they play to the sensitive tunes of the female vulnerability. Traditions, manners, taboos, and religion mix in one melting pot that defines stereotyped outlines for our ideal character and our perfect mate. We are dictated the answers to all the quizzes but we are left to face the final tests alone – we fail with flying colors.

The Toy Boy Nightmare

A few years ago I wrote a letter to Santa asking for my perfect man; I went into details describing his character, his career, his attitude, his manners, his looks, his star sign, his Chinese sign, his marital status, his hygiene standards, his beliefs, and his outlook on life. I had a long list of things that Santa should avoid but it did not cross my mind to ask for a man my age or a few years older; I thought it went without saying that younger guys were not an option. I used to wonder what some of my friends found in a guy who was 5, 7, or 10 years younger that they were. I used to wonder what a young guy had to say to someone who was carrying her schoolbag when he was sucking on his thumb. My heart went out to those ladies who had to bear the inquisitive eyes that followed them wherever they took their toy boy. I was so certain that I will never walk the famous mile in their shoes. I assured myself that I am bulletproof safe from that kind of disgusting despair. I knew that I will never be as lonely or as insane as they were. I surprised myself … I was wrong!

It all started when I noticed that 22 & 23 year old guys found me attractive; whether they were students in my classes or trainees in my workshops, I used to smile and gently push them out of my way. I felt flattered but I was always in control of my actions and emotions. Last year I made a slight exception – a year or two younger is not such a big deal, especially if he is well-traveled, well-exposed, and well set in his career. My toy-boy-alarm was in the making; just the thought of me settling for this type of public humiliation gave me immediate palpitations. Last January, a 24 year old writer developed a crush on me; he was young, cute, and, on top of it all, he had great brains. Instead of redirecting his route away from me, I caught myself red-handed flirting with him. A dreamy “I don’t want to lose you” flew out of his mouth to slap me on the face. The harsh wake-up call startled me ... what on earth was I doing? But then I ignored the voice of reason and enjoyed listening to his passionate compliments about how I made him feel and how much he wanted to be with me. He got attached and I sobered up; I vanished and he was hurt.

A few weeks later, I crossed paths with another writer – 7 years younger! This time my defenses were up and I would not allow myself to repeat my previous mistake. I turned this connection into an online intellectual friendship but I am still curious about the other side of the fence. I dedicated a special dark corner in my head where I buried all such thoughts and feelings – they just scared me. I am 32 but luckily, because I tend to be well-maintained, I do not look it – it was never about looks, was it? I am a single independent career-oriented girl who is starved for love and attention. I miss being in a relationship and I miss the little things that add a warming flavor to my spreadsheet of a life; the surprises, the love words, the excitement before a date, the dreamy reminiscence after a date, and the phone calls that are directly wired to my heart. I want to have a plan for the weekend and someone to look forward to talking to. I want to come out of my class to find a missed call or a text message from someone – not my mother, not my friends, and not work-related.

Is it that I do not meet enough men? Is it that I do not attract them? No! There are plenty of them around me but I just do not like them. I do not like their baggage; be it an ex wife, a current wife, kids, bad experiences, imbedded resentment for women, commitment phobia, independence-related selfishness, emotional stinginess, financial stinginess, lack of expressiveness, over-eagerness, hair loss, muscle loss, a spare tire around their waist, or a midlife crisis. Men who are my age, or a bit older, have given up on life or given in to life. They are either married, defeated, depressive, deformed, or plain ugly. The few who are eligible candidates do not want to be with me, my dozen professions, and my radical opinions. They do not want an equal and cannot accept a superior; they want a young girl whom they could control, boss around, guide, and manipulate in the name of love! They want a young mother for their kids and an inexperienced wife in their bed. Let’s face it: at the age of 35, a guy can easily have a healthy relationship with someone who is 25, 26, 27 or 28 years old. I am developing a scary form of cannibalism; young hearts, fresh skin, and green minds attract me. I love the puppy-love look in their hope-filled eyes, the sweet compliments, the need to be with me and around me, the attention, the eagerness to please, the fear of loosing me, and the pride of showing me off to their friends.

I met my most recent prey by coincidence – ironically before one of my relationships episodes on TV. We talked before I started filming and the chemistry was there; the flow was so natural and interesting. After I was done, he told me that I sounded so intellectual and that I was great, then he asked me to wait for him until he was done with his segment. His words caressed the proud tigress in me and, at the same time, touched my maternal instinct. I was caught off guard! I was so confused. He is 26, obviously young, very successful, creative, witty, sarcastic, and funny. Two weeks later he took my number, and we went out on a …. emmmm …. meeting. To add a few years to his age, he wore masculine cologne, did not talk much, and smiled scarcely. I enjoyed his company and loved his wit. I did not mind his age or the different life he led; we were extreme opposites yet I missed him, enjoyed talking to him, gave him space in my mind, and looked forward to seeing him again. I felt that I lived in a glass house and I was under the illusion that people are throwing stones at me; when my producer asked me how he was, I said that he was too young!

The sad news is that just as much as I can see through the lonely over-eager older guys, younger guys can see through the false tough façade that I so brilliantly set up for myself. I have become so trained on picking up the vibes of desperate hunters, and young guys can easily sense my cannibalism and need for affection. Old worn out bodies with heavy cynical heads turn me off, and young white-slate girls pose as viable competitors. The four players – older guys, me, younger guys, and young girls – formed an infamous hide and seek game. I have no living proof of the success or the continuity of any such toy boy relations. I do not like the way I see the future – I see a 45 year old hag hunting young mouthwatering kids and devouring their hopes, aspirations, and futures. This is topping the chart of my worst fears. I will save my thoughts, shut down my laptop, sleep, and when I wake up I want it to be over. I want to be stronger and in control again. I am so vulnerable; I have nightmares – toy boy nightmares.

100 “GOOD GIRL” TIPS - Marketing Analogy

Your vision:
To be perceived as a good girl at all times.

Your mission:
To bend over backwards to please others.

Your positioning statement:
The Ultimate Denying Experience (apologies to BMW)

Your target audience:
Vain ladies and gentlemen.

Your objectives:
Trial and, hopefully, purchase.

Your Marketing Mix:
Product: You
Price: Your Life
Place: "Good girl" outlets though "good girl" distribution channels
Promotion:
1) Advertising - Personal ads & word of mouth
2) Public Relations - Favorable speeches & crisis management strategies
3) Sales Promotion - Limited edition (until putting on a ring on the naked left finger)
4) Direct Marketing - Cute emails & regular SMSes to all eligible bachelors and mothers of potential bachelors
5) Personal Selling - Promote your cooking, sewing, budgeting, and loving competive advantages in all outings

Alf alf mabrouk (Congrats!)

100 “GOOD GIRL” TIPS - Chapter 10

Chapter 10 – The “good guy” you deserve

1) As long as he comes home in the end, he can do as he pleases.
2) As long as he feeds you, keep your mouth shut.
3) He can force you to stay home – you never had a career anyway.
4) He can boss you around – you never had an opinion, so why complain now?
5) He can be as disrespectful as he wants, and you can cry as much as you want.
6) He can beat you up for every white lie he discovered.
7) He is fully entitled to isolate you from the female friends you never had.
8) A “good guy” is jealous; you will never get to wear your stashed wardrobe.
9) He will never tarnish your innocence and take you dancing; he will have a girlfriend to escort him.
10) If you give birth to a baby girl, he will make sure she is brought up as a “good girl”!

Conclusion:

I proudly announce that, over the past 10 years, I have managed to convert from being a “good girl” to a “bad girl”.

100 “GOOD GIRL” TIPS - Chapter 9

Chapter 9 – Absolute NOs

1) Drinking is totally unacceptable – it is always your first sip.
2) Girls with a tattoo are bad – have yours in a hidden place.
3) Girls with a belly piercing are loose – hide yours but talk about it.
4) You always have a curfew – it is always the first time you’ve missed it.
5) Dancing is for “bad girls”, “good girls” stare and curl their lips.
6) “Good girls” never go to bars or pubs – it is always your first time.
7) Love? Every man you meet is your first, and last, love!
8) Sex? What sex?
9) Internet dating; a “good girl” always rises above such obscenities.
10) Strength, brains, independence, career, and a life are male-repellents.

100 “GOOD GIRL” TIPS - Chapter 8

Chapter 8 – Your weapons

1) Tears will get you out of absolutely anything.
2) Apologies will erase any opinion you might have accidentally voiced.
3) Blindfolds; put them on and rest in peace.
4) Mouth gags are a great tool to keep your mouth shut when hurt and if insulted.
5) Your back; turn it to anyone who needs help and you will never get in trouble.
6) Put on a sad face and you will always be the adorable center of attention.
7) Put on the lost princess look and a savior is bound to show up.
8) White lies were created to make you prettier.
9) Black lies were created to make your man happier.
10) A veil will give you immunity – put it on and do as you please.

100 “GOOD GIRL” TIPS - Chapter 7

Chapter 7 – Your career

1) The sole purpose of working is to meet Mr. Right.
2) Avoid careers; “good guys” do not appreciate them.
3) Get a job that gives you minimum exposure and zero fulfillment.
4) A promotion is not an achievement; finding a man is.
5) A trip abroad is never good news.
6) Be a friend to all.
7) “Good girls” do not talk to their male colleagues.
8) If you have to talk to them, make it strictly professional.
9) Your male boss and colleagues are werewolves in disguise.
10) Your female boss and colleagues are always jealous – poor you!

100 “GOOD GIRL” TIPS - Chapter 6

Chapter 6 – Your character

1) Have no character; be as colorless as possible.
2) “Good girls” are modest; stifle your self-esteem.
3) Be soft and mild to attract a “good guy”
4) You are obedient to the bone.
5) Have no aspirations; you were born to be a mother and a wife.
6) If you have aspirations; they are family obligations not your choice.
7) Public displays and private affairs should be kept miles apart.
8) You have a selective version of Alzheimer’s – use it when cornered.
9) Being illusive will make you more desirable.
10) Being a double-faced hypocrite will make you more mysterious.

100 “GOOD GIRL” TIPS - Chapter 5

Chapter 5 – Your opinions

1) Have no opinions what so ever.
2) If you have an opinion, keep it to yourself.
3) If you happen to have brains, hide them – brains scare “good guys”.
4) Go with the flow; if they hate miniskirts, then you’ve never seen one.
5) Thinking is bad for your health.
6) If you really surly truly have to disagree, agree first.
7) No matter what, avoid having any opinions on sex, religion, politics, independence, women, men, life, and death.
8) “I aim to please” – repeat it and act upon it.
9) You’ve always wanted to get married to a guy like your dad.
10) You’ve always wanted to be like your mother when you grew up.

100 “GOOD GIRL” TIPS - Chapter 4

Chapter 4 – The sisters

1) Always be seen in the company of other “good girls”.
2) Never tell a “good girl” a secret; she will blackmail you.
3) Never introduce a “good girl” to a potential guy; she will innocently hit on him.
4) Never cry in front of a “good girl”; she will bring it up again to hurt you.
5) Never talk to a “good girl” who is turning into a “bad girl”.
6) Be a diplomat; anything you say will be used against you.
7) Be a nun; forgive, forget, and never tell.
8) Be an idiot; nerds never threatened anyone.
9) If you have an urge to talk about sex, it is never you; it is always about “one of those girls”.
10) Never call another “good girl” a bad name in her face – you can say anything you want behind her back.

100 “GOOD GIRL” TIPS - Chapter 3

Chapter 3 – the epitome of innocence

1) Avoid talking to guys – if possible.
2) Talk to them while standing up – to give the impression that it is a casual chat.
3) Sit with a guy in groups only – you are a “good girl”, remember that.
4) Never get involved with a guy.
5) Hide it if you do.
6) Lie about it if you are asked.
7) Deny it forever when it is over.
8) Never hold hands in public.
9) Do anything you want in private.
10) No matter what, you are always a virgin and you do not know how babies are made.

100 “GOOD GIRL” TIPS - Chapter 2

Chapter 2 – Watch your manners

1) Speak in a low decent tone regardless of how low and indecent your words are.
2) Laughing out loud in public is not becoming of a “good girl”.
3) Keep your legs closed and close to one another in public.
4) If you do otherwise, with your legs, in private, always say it is the first time.
5) Smile at all times – it makes you look authentic.
6) Avoiding eye-contact does not make you a liar, it just makes you shy.
7) Learn from Halle Berry; the look but don’t touch attitude flies well.
8) A “good girl” never ever smokes – in the bathroom is fine.
9) Shishas & lollipops are out of the question – “good guys” are quite imaginative.
10) Table manners dictate that you should eat in silence and smile when necessary.

100 “GOOD GIRL” TIPS

Introduction:

Being a “good girl” in our society is not exactly rocket science. If you are over 18, use these tips to strengthen your social positioning and to polish your image, if and whenever needed.

Chapter 1 – The dull doll look

1) Have a wardrobe of cute girly, or tom-boyish, outfits for family visits – they will never notice you growing up.
2) Have a stash of sexy tops to go with your hidden ultra low rise jeans for hanging out purposes – great disguise.
3) Curly hair is a sign of wildness; straighten it to give you an innocent look or cover it for the ultimate trustworthy look.
4) If you add a few blond streaks, always make it sound like the stupid hairdresser’s mistake.
5) Use lip gloss and pout.
6) Use volumizing mascara and flutter your lashes.
7) Try natural color blush to give you the needed flush.
8) Invest in a great concealer to hide your pores, your age, and your imperfections.
9) Gaze into an imaginary line behind whoever you are talking to for a super dull look.
10) If you are tempted to straighten your back and show off you femininity, remember that you are a heap of bones wrapped up in fat and covered with flawed skin.

Tic Toc … It’s the Biological Clock! - Conclusion

Audrey Hepburn shared with women her age-defying beauty tips saying “For attractive lips, speak words of kindness. For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people. For a slim figure, share your food with the hungry. For poise, walk with the knowledge that you never walk alone. People, even more than things, have to be restored, revived, reclaimed and redeemed; never throw out anyone. Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, you'll find them at the end of each of your arms. As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands, one for helping yourself, the other for helping others. The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman must be seen from in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. The beauty of a woman is not in a facial mole, but the true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It is the caring that she lovingly gives and the passion that she shows. The beauty of a woman grows with the passing years.” Having spoken my mind, the single girls were silent and pensive, and the single guys were silent and attentive – I rested my case and my soup was cold.

Tic Toc … It’s the Biological Clock! - PART 5

The single 33, 34, 36, and 40 year old girls began telling their tales of rejection that basically rotated on the fact that he, or his mother, thought they were too old to have kids. They talked about the inquisitive eyes, questioning looks, the muttering, the murmuring, the whispering, and the curled lips that stalk them in weddings, parties, gatherings, and outings. Society and family deny them the right to choose and to refuse because they are “too old”. They struggle with their self-esteem and self-fulfillment, and are torn apart between their hormones, nesting phases, and settling down urges - we ladies suffer! I barged in again lending my fellow single females a supporting hand. I played my favorite Libra game; single and happy or married and miserable? Single gal or single mom? No man or wrong man? No kids or wrong kids? I hit a bull’s eye when I mentioned the possibility of adoption; if your maternal instinct is nagging non stop and Mr. Right took a wrong turn on his way to you, nonetheless, you can still be a mother. Options start from nephews and nieces, cats and dogs, to sponsored orphans and live in orphans. Motherhood is not about getting pregnant and giving birth; motherhood is all about nurturing and caring – be it a warm hug, a sound advice, a shoulder to cry on, or a comforting smile.