Ask Marwa: Was it love?

Hello Marwa,

I am a 24 year old female who works for a reputable company. Two years ago, I fell in love with a colleague. I was attracted to his wonderful character and religious sense in addition to his gentlemanliness. The problem is that during that period, he never stated directly and frankly to me that he loves me, but his eyes were saying it and the birthday party that he prepared for me said it too. Anyway, I waited and waited, but no step was taken from his side and I got engaged to someone I don't know through an arranged marriage.

My fiancée loved me a lot, but I could not love him at all. Actually, I hated everything about him; he was a smoker and I hate smokers and he watches pornography and whenever we were together in the club or in a cafe, he did not miss any chance to look at and comment on any female. After six months, my fiancée got a job abroad and I only saw him online. After another six months, I received an SMS from the colleague that I was in love with saying "I know it took me too long to say it but I love you so much."

In a minute, everything that I felt or though that I felt for my fiancée vanished. I could only think of my colleague and how long I waited for him to declare his love for me. I took the decision to leave my fiancée and break up the engagement one month before my wedding. My loving colleague was supposed to come back to Egypt at the end of the year in which all of these events happened (2007). We were talking on the phone everyday in a very respectable manner (nothing beyond I love you and I miss you was said and that is why I loved him so much.)

However, two weeks before his flight to Egypt, we stopped communicating, I don't know how it happened, but it happened. Then he called me to tell me that financially speaking we will not be able to be together in spite of the fact that I was ready to live in any level just to be with him and I offered to buy us an apartment here in Egypt. He sent me an SMS to wish me a better future and he left me. I heard nothing about him since then.I do not know if money was the real problem or there was something else. Was he getting back at me for getting engaged and leaving him? But I did not do so; he was the one who did not do anything or take any step.

My questions are: Was I mistaken to leave my fiancée? Did that colleague deserve that sacrifice (if you knew that my fiancée's financial conditions were great)? Was I really in love?

Badly Hurt

Read my reply